JokesArcade

Twas the night before Christmas–Old Santa was pissed.

He cussed out the elves and threw down his list

“Your miserable brats and ungrateful jerks,

I’ve a bloody good mind to scrap the whole works!”

I’ve busted my ass for damn near one year,

Instead of ‘Thanks Santa’…….just what do I hear?

The old lady bitches, ’cause I work late all night.

The elves want more money; the reindeers all fight.

Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids,

Donner is pregnant—even Vixen got laid!

And just when I thought things would start to get better

Those assholes from Tax sent me this bloody letter,

They say I owe taxes – now isn’t that funny

Who in the hell ever SENT Santa money?

And the kids these days, they all are just the pits

They want the impossible, those mean little shits

I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds

And assembling those dolls…their heads, arms and legs

I made tons of yo yo’s–No request for them

It’s robots & computers!!!!…they think I’m IBM

Flying through the air… the trees hard to see

Falling down chimneys as I try not to pee

I’m quitting this job there’s no longer enjoyment

I’ll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment .

There’s No Christmas this year, now you all know the reason

and I found me a blonde; I’m going SOUTH for the season