Doctors Jokes
Queers & Rears
Posted in Doctors Jokes on July 28th, 2011 by admin – Be the first to commentA young doctor had moved into a small town and was setting up a new practice. He had a new sign painted and hung it in front of his office, proclaiming his specialties:
“Homosexuals & Hemorrhoids”
The town fathers were greatly upset with the sign and asked him please to change it. The Doctor was eager to please, so he put up a new sign:
“Queers & Rears”
The town fathers were really fuming about that one, so they demanded that the Doctor come up with a decent sign that would not offend the townspeople. So the Doctor finally came up with an acceptable sign:
“Odds & Ends”
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Posted in AdvertisementThat’s baaaaaaaaaad
Posted in Doctors Jokes on July 25th, 2011 by admin – Be the first to commentDoctor, Doctor I tend to flush a lot.
Don’t worry it’s just a chain reaction!
Doctor, doctor I keep thinking I’m a bee
Buzz off can’t you see I’m busy?
Doctor these pills you gave me for BO…
What’s wrong with them?
They keep slipping out from under my arms!
Doctor, Doctor everyone keeps throwing me in the garbage.
Don’t talk rubbish!
Doctor, Doctor I feel like a sheep.
That’s baaaaaaaaaad!
Doctor, Doctor I feel like a bee.
Well buzz off I’m busy!
Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I’m a mosquito
Go away, sucker!
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Posted in AdvertisementPosted in Doctors Jokes on July 20th, 2011 by admin – Be the first to comment
Hank Smith gets home from work one day and finds his wife has been crying. “What’s wrong?” he asks.
“John, promise you won’t get mad, but I went to see the new doctor today and he told me I’ve got a pretty pussy.”
“WHAT?” he shouts. With that he grabs a baseball bat from the cupboard and storms down to the doctor’s office and through the reception area.
Without knocking he bursts into the doctor’s office. The doctor is in the process of giving an old lady a breast examination. She screams and tries to cover herself. Without waiting, Mr. Smith charges up to the doctor, smashes the baseball bat down on the desk and says, “You flaming pervert how dare you say my wife has a pretty pussy!”
The doctor replies, “I’m sorry Mr. Smith, but there has been a misunderstanding. I only told your wife that she has Acute Angina.”
Doctr pathan K Pichay
Posted in Doctors Jokes on July 20th, 2011 by admin – Be the first to commentDoctor pathan K Pichay Bhag Raha Tha
Logon N Pocha;
Kya Hua?
Doctr:4 Bar Aisa Hua
Sala Dimaagh K Opration K Bahaney Aata hy
or
TIND Kerwa K Bhag Jata hai.
swallowed a razor
Posted in Doctors Jokes on July 20th, 2011 by admin – Be the first to comment“Doctor, please hurry. My son swallowed a razor-blade.”
“Don’t panic, I’m coming immediately. Have you done anything yet ?”
“Yea, I shaved with the electric razor.”
nose from running
Posted in Doctors Jokes on July 20th, 2011 by admin – Be the first to commentDoctor Doctor I swallowed a bone.
Are you choking?
No, I really did!
Doctor, Doctor I think I need glasses
You certainly do, Sir, this is a fish and chip shop!
Doctor, Doctor my son has swallowed my pen, what should I do?
Use a pencil �till I get there
Doctor, Doctor I think I’m a bell?
Take these and if it doesn’t help give me a ring!
Doctor, Doctor I think I’m suffering from Deja Vu!
Didn’t I see you yesterday?
Doctor, Doctor I’ve got wind! Can you give me something?
Yes – here’s a kite!
Doctor, how do I stop my nose from running?!
Stick your foot out and trip it up!
postcard
Posted in Doctors Jokes on July 20th, 2011 by admin – Be the first to commentA doctor was having an affair with his nurse. Shortly afterward, she told him that she was pregnant. Not wanting his wife to know, he gave the nurse a sum of money and asked her to go to Italy and have the baby there.
“But how will I let you know the baby is born?” she asked.
He replied, “Just send me a postcard and write “spaghetti” on the back. I’ll take care of expenses.” Not knowing what else to do, the nurse took the money and flew to Italy.
Six months went by, and then one day the doctor’s wife called him at the office and said, “Dear, you received a very strange postcard in the mail today from Europe, and I don’t understand what it means.”
The doctor said, “Just wait until I get home and I will explain it to you.”
Later that evening the doctor came home, read the postcard, and fell to the floor with a heart attack. Paramedics rushed him to the hospital emergency room. The head medic stayed back to comfort the wife. He asked what trauma had precipitated the cardiac arrest.
So the wife picked up the card and read: “Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti – Two with sausage and meatballs; two without.”
I was sitting in a fridge & someone threw it
Posted in Doctors Jokes on July 29th, 2010 by admin – Be the first to commentOne morning at a doctor’s clinic, a patient arrives complaining of serious back-pain. The doctor examines him and asks him” OK, what happened to your back?”
The patient replies “You know that I work for a local night club? This morning I got home to my apartment early and heard a noise in my bedroom. On entering I knew someone had been with my wife and the balcony door was open. I rushed out the balcony door and did not find anyone. As I looked down from the balcony I saw a man running out and he was dressing himself. I grabbed the fridge and threw it at him, that’s how I strained my back”
The 2nd patient arrives looking as if he has been in a car wreck. The doctor said “My previous patient looked bad, but you look terrible. What the hell happened to you?”
He replied, “You know I have been unemployed for a while now .Today was the first day at my new job. I forgot to set my alarm and was running late. I was running out of the building, getting dressed at the same time, and you won’t believe it but I was hit by a fridge.”
The 3rd patient arrives; he looks even worse than the other two Patients do. The doctor is shocked. Again asks, “What the hell happened to youuuuuu…..?”
“Well I was sitting in a fridge & someone threw it from the 3rd floor…….
Clean & Best Funny Doctor Jokes | Short & One Liner Doctor Joke
Posted in Doctors Jokes on April 24th, 2009 by admin – Be the first to commentDoctors are the heroes of every society. They play a vital role in societies and give a crucial end to make the society more strong and healthy. A detailed research has shown that no society can develop without having some medical experts like doctors. As every body knows that fun and humour can never end and no body could save himself being victim of it. So Doctor Jokes also provides a good source of humour. For this concern, we have made a distinct category of Doctor Jokes. You will found here jokes about doctor, funny doctor jokes, short doctor jokes, doctors jokes, doctor doctor jokes, best doctor jokes, dirty doctor jokes, clean doctor jokes, good doctor jokes, eye doctor jokes, doctor jokes one liners and doctor jokes for kids. We have also managed to deliver you daily Doctor Joke of the day. Must check out!!
Idiots · Husbands · Doctors · Pregnancy
Posted in Doctors Jokes on February 24th, 2009 by admin – Be the first to commentA man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant,
and her contractions are only two minutes apart!”
“Is this her first child?” the doctor queries.
“No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her husband!”