JokesArcade

Our Sardar, one day is at the railway station. He asks one man “When will Rajdhani Express go from here”?Man Replies 12.30. “When will Punjab Express go from here”?Man Replies 10.30. “When will Deccan Queen go from here”?Man Replies 12.30. Thus the sardar goes on asking for all the trains. Now the man gets fed up and asks whether he wants to go to punjab by train or not.Sardar replies, “NO. I only want to cross the tracks!”

Police: Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phansi di jayegi.
Sardar: Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Police: Kyon hasn rahe ho?
Sardar: Main to uthta hi subha 9 baje hun.

Mrs. Banta Singh was in the habit of having long conversation on the telephone,

sometimes going on over an hour. One day she hung up after 25 minutes.“What is

the matter today? asked her husband. “Today you had less than.

Man: Sardar jee aap ko garmi lagti hai to kya karte ho?
Sardar: AC k paas ja k baith jata hun

Man: Agar phir bhi garmi lage to?
Sardar: To A/C on kar leta hun

A Sardarji and an American are seated next to each other on a flight from Los Angeles to New York. The American asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Sardarji, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.

The American persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He says, “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me five dollars, and vice versa.” Again, he declines and tries to get some sleep.

The American, now agitated, says, “Okay, if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5,and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $500.”

This catches the Sardarji’s attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment, agrees to the game. The American asks the first question: “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?” The Sardarji doesn’t say a word, reaches into his wallet,pulls out a $5.00 bill, and hands it to the American.

“Okay,” says the American, “your turn”.

He asks, “What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?” The American, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer & searches all his preferences……..no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the Internet and the Library of Congress… no answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers but to no avail.

After an hour, he wakes the Sardarji and hands him $500. The Sardarji thanks him and turns back to get some more sleep.

The American, who is more than a little miffed, stirs the Sardarji and asks, “Well, what’s the answer?” Without a word, the Sardarji reaches into his purse,hands the american $5,and goes back to sleep.

Ek sardar ki chatri me hole tha

kisine pucha,umbrella me hole kyu?

2nd sardar: agar koi bomb raste me phat gia to?

SarEditdar bola,Oye barish ruk jayegi to pata kaise chalega

Santa Singh and Banta singh are sitting in a bar sipping Black Label Johnny

walker when Banta singh noticed a gorgeous blonde sitting by herself in a corner.

As he was getting up to talk to her. Bar Tender said “Hey don’t worry about her,

She is lesbian! “. Banta singh “Lesbian or no lesbian, I get all of them” Then

leaping forward in a very sexy voice he said “Where exactly in Lesbia, you from?”

SANTA SINGH GETS HOME EARLY
FROM WORK AND HEARS STRANGE
NOISES COMING
FROM THE BEDROOM. HE RUSHES
UPSTAIRS TO FIND HIS WIFE NAKED
ON THE BED,
SWEATING AND PANTING.
“WHAT’S UP?” HE SAYS: “I’M HAVING
A HEART ATTACK,” CRIES THE
WOMAN.
HE RUSHES DOWNSTAIRS TO
GRAB THE PHONE, BUT JUST AS
HE’S DIALING, HIS
4-YEAR-OLD SON COMES UP AND
SAYS “DADDY! DADDY! UNCLE
BANTA IS HIDING IN
YOUR CLOSET AND HE’S GOT NO
CLOTHES ON!”
SANTA SLAMS THE PHONE DOWN
AND STORMS UPSTAIRS INTO THE
BEDROOM, PAST HIS SCREAMING
WIFE, AND RIPS OPEN THE
WARDROBE DOOR. SURE ENOUGH,
THERE IS HIS BROTHER, TOTALLY
NAKED, COWERING ON THE
CLOSET FLOOR.
“YOU IDIOT!” SAYS THE
HUSBAND: “MY WIFE’S HAVING A
HEART ATTACK AND YOU’RE
RUNNING AROUND NAKED
SCARING THE KIDS!”

Everybody knows the famous under creek/sea tunnel joining England and France. Before it’s construction, the tenders were invited from various construction companies by giving newspaper ads throughout the world. Banta Singh came across one such ad and he decided to fill the tender. On the day of opening the tenders everybody was surprised to find Banta Singh’s tender at it’s very lowest. Other tenders were quoting billions of pounds, Banta Sing had offered to do the job for just 10000 pounds. Now , as per the rule Banta was to get the contract. Before giving works order to Banta Singh, the officer asked BantaSingh as to how he could afford to work at such a low budget. Banta Singh said,”look, back home, there is my brother, Santa Singh.I will call him here. We will take two shovels. I will start diging from English bank and Santa Singh will start digging from French bank. The moment we meet, you get a tunnel.” The dumbstruck officer asked with courage,” and if you don’t meet?” Banta Singh replied,” then you will get two tunnels in same cost.”

One day a sardarji was sitting in his
office on the
thirteenth floor building when a man
came running in
to his office and shouted “Santa Singh
your daughter Preeto just died in an
accident!”

Sardarji was in
panic.
Not knowing what to do he jumped
from his office window.

While coming down when he was
near the tenth
floor he remembered he didn’t have a
daughter named
Preeto.

When he was near the fifth floor he
remembered
he was not married.

When he was about to hit the ground
he remembered he was not Santa
Singh.