Happy Christmas to all. As we all know on 25th December Christianity commemorate the birth of Jesus. Our team has collected a huge collection of Christmas Jokes for our valuable users to keep them smiling on this great occassion, You can use these Jokes as Christmas SMS also to wish your loved once via text messages. Enjoy your stay here and have fun!
Why do Mexicans re-fry their beans?
Have you seen a Mexican do anything right the first time?
4 men – a Marathi, Bengali, Gujrati and our Santa were being interviewed for a top
job. With nothing to choose between them, the President told them over dinner
that the decisive test would be carried out the following morning, with each
candidate being asked the same question and the best answer would get them the
job.
The next morning, first up was the Marathi. “Here’s your question,” said the
President, “What’s the fastest thing in the world?” Without hesitation, he replied
“A thought, because it takes no time at all.” “Very good answer,” said the
President.
Next up was the Gujrati, “What’s the fastest thing in the world?” asked the
president. “A blink,” replied the Gujju almost instantaneously, “cos you don’t
think about a blink. It’s a reflex.” “Good answer,” replied the president.
Next was the Bengali, “What’s the fastest thing in the world?” asked the president.
The Bengali thought for a moment, “Electricity, because you can flip a switch and
20 miles away a light will go on immediately.” “That’s a great answer,” replied the
president.
Finally, it was our Santa’s turn. “What`s the fastest thing in the world?” asked the
president. Scratching his head Santa replied: “Diarrhoea, because last night after
dinner I was lying on my bed when I got these awful stomach pains and before I
could think, blink or turn on the light…..”
Doctor: I have some bad news and some very bad news.
Patient: Well, might as well give me the bad news first.
Doctor: The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live.
Patient: 24 HOURS! Thats terrible!! WHAT could be WORSE? What’s the very bad news?
Doctor: I’ve been trying to reach you since yesterday.
3 backpackers, an Englishman,a Welshman and an Irishman walked into a bar in
Sydney.The trio walk up to bar,the bartender leans over.He says “I DON’T WANT
ANY FIGHTS!If you start any
Patient: Doctor, yeh mera pehla operation hai. thoda dhyaan se karna.
Doctor: dara mat. yeh mera bhi pehla operation hai
Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Sardar: An old king’s skeleton.
Tourist: Who’s that smaller skeleton next to it?
Sardar: That was same king’s skeleton when he was a child.
Teacher to Sardar: “Where were U born?”
Sardar: In Tiruvanantapuram.
3238578thm.gif
Teacher: Spell it?
Sardar: (after thinking) I think I was born in GOA.
Chuck Norris shot down a plane by pointing up and yelling bang
What do you call a Mexican driving a BMW?
Grand Theft Auto.
A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, he pulls him out and says “Sorry, you know the law, you’ve got to go back across the border right now.”
The mexican man pleads with them, “No, noooo Senior, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!”
The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself, I’m going to make it hard for him and says “Ok, I’ll let you stay if you can use 3 english words in a sentence”.
The Mexican man of course agrees.
The Border Patrol Agent tells him, “The 3 words are: Green, Pink and Yellow. Now use them in 1 sentence.”
The Mexican man thinks really hard for about 2 minutes, then says, “Hmmm, Ok. The phone, it went Green, Green, Green, I Pink it up and sez Yellow?