Happy Christmas to all. As we all know on 25th December Christianity commemorate the birth of Jesus. Our team has collected a huge collection of Christmas Jokes for our valuable users to keep them smiling on this great occassion, You can use these Jokes as Christmas SMS also to wish your loved once via text messages. Enjoy your stay here and have fun!
Teacher: Zameen par rehne wali janwer bacche deti hai, Hawa mein urne wali andey deti hai!
Woh konsi cheez hai jo hawa mai bhi urti hai or bacche bhi deti hai??
Student: “Air Hostess!”
Chuck Norris killed two stones with one bird
Two gay men are beach walking, holding hands when a beautiful young blonde woman passes them. She’s 5’10″, 120 lbs, 38-24-36, with a string bikini on and no tan lines.
The first gay man turns to his friend, sighs audibly, and in a breathless whisper says, “It’s women like her that sometimes make me wish I was a Lesbian!!”
A little boy about 10 years old was walking down the sidewalk, dragging a flattened frog on a string behind him. He came up to the doorstep of a whore house and knocked on the door. When the Madam answered it, she saw the little boy and asked what he wanted. He said, "I want to have sex with one of the women inside. I have the money to buy it, and I’m not leaving until I get it.” The Madam figured, why not, so she told him to come in. Once in, she told him to pick any of the girls he liked. He asked, "Do any of the girls have any diseases?” Of course, the Madam said, "No!” He said,
"I heard all the men talking about having to get shots after making love with Amber. THAT’S the girl I want.” Since the little boy was so adamant and had the money to pay for it, the Madam told him to go to the first room on the right. He headed down the hall dragging the squashed frog behind him. Ten minutes later he came back, still dragging the frog, paid the Madam, and headed out the door! . The Madam stopped him and asked,
"Why did you pick the only girl in the place with a disease, instead of one of the others?” He said, "Well, if you must know, tonight when I get home, my parents are going out to a restaurant to eat, leaving me at home with a baby-sitter. After they leave, my baby-sitter will have sex with me because she just happens to be very fond of cute little boys. She will then get the disease that I just caught. When Mom and Dad get back, Dad will take the baby-sitter home. On the way, he’ll jump the baby-sitter’s bones, and he’ll catch the disease. Then when Dad gets home from the baby-sitters, he and Mom will go to bed and have sex, and Mom will catch it. In the morning when Dad goes to work, the Milkman will deliver the milk, have a quickie with Mom and catch the disease, and HE’S the son-of-a-bitch who ran over my FROG!”
A group of retirees are on a bus trip when an old lady comes up to the driver and complains about being molested. The driver wonders who would want to molest her, and so tells her to go back and sit down.
Later, another old woman approaches and complains about molestation, and the driver tells her to go back and sit.
A third old lady screams and so this time the driver goes to investigate. He finds an old man on his hands and knees, and so he asks him what he’s doing.
The old man says, “I’m trying to grab my toupee. Each time I grab it, it jumps and runs away screaming.”
Little Johnny ran out to a field his Pa was plowing to report, “there’s a strange
man at the house. I dunno what he wants.”
“Son,” the father told him, “if it’s the landlord, he wants his rent. If it’s the banker,
he’s come to foreclose the mortgage. And if it’s a traveling salesman, you run
home fast as your legs will carry you and sit in your maw’s lap til I get there!”
Did you hear about that one Mexican that went to college?
yeah.. me neither
Digg DiggThree pieces of string walked into a bar. The first piece of string went up
to the bar and asked the barman “Can i have three pints of beer please?”” The
barman replied “”No sorry mate
Customar (hotel manger se-subah ke waqt mai baid pe breajfast lena pasnd krta hu
Manegar-no problam lekin apko apna bed neche restra me lana hoga
Little Johnny wanted to go to the zoo and pestered his parents for days. Finally his mother talked his reluctant father into taking him.
“So how was it?” his mother asked when they returned home.
“Great,” Little Johnny replied.
“Did you and daddy have a good time?” asked his mother.
“Yeah, daddy really liked it too,” exclaimed Little Johnny, “especially when one of the animals came home at 30 to 1!”