Happy Christmas to all. As we all know on 25th December Christianity commemorate the birth of Jesus. Our team has collected a huge collection of Christmas Jokes for our valuable users to keep them smiling on this great occassion, You can use these Jokes as Christmas SMS also to wish your loved once via text messages. Enjoy your stay here and have fun!

I was about to bone my girlfriend and then she saw bigfoot and i told her she didnt see it and then the mosquitos got bad and she said theres no way

So the other day I bought a pocket rocket for my 8 year old son, man those things are cool. Before long I found myself “test riding” it to make sure it’s safe for him… though I was actually enjoying myself. I found myself wondering if anybody jumped these things… and thanks to Youtube we found a few pocket rocket jumps that didn’t go quite as planned. Funny!

Ok, so this kid “Troy” hits a ramp in his front yard. Looks like he’s going pretty fast… LEAN BACK! Lol.

My knees hurt just watching this…
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And for the finali… (this is a good one)
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Any of our readers ever ride these things? I seriously was suprised at how cool things there were. Too bad these things weren’t around when I was growing up… I feel like I was deprived of some sort of childhood privelage. It was just me and the pedals back then.

One day an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walked into a pub together.

They proceeded to each buy a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the thick head.

The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust.

The Scotsman fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened.

The Irishman too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer and then started yelling, “SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU BASTARD!!!!“

I was a big fan of the Simpson’s, can you believe how long the show has been around? Everyone has their favorite characters, but mine is definately Homer. This guy says the funniest (and often completely true) things. Here is…

So there‘s these 2 muffins in an oven.

They‘re both sitting, just chilling and getting baked.

And one of them yells “God Damn, it‘s hot in here!“

And the other muffin replies “Holy Crap, a talking muffin!“

blonde:4Why did the blonde climb over a glass wall?

To see what was on the other side.

A man walks into a doctors office one day, completely naked, and covered in saran wrap. He goes to the doctor, and the doctor does some tests, and hours later, he tells the man, “Well, I can clearly see your nuts.”

Q: What should you give an elf who wants to be taller?
A: Elf raising flour.

There where three guys called::: Shit” Fuckoff and Manners.

they where all about to cross a road. when suddenly…Shit got run over by a car.

so Fuckoff went to a police station near by to get help.

so Fuckoff rushed in the police station and said: Help! Help! My Freind Just
Got Ran Over By A Car!

POLICEMAN: Ok I Would Like To Know Your Name First.

FUCKOFF: My Name Is Fuckoff.

POLICEMAN: Pardon???

FUCKOFF: My Name Is Fuckoff!!!

POLICEMAN: Wheres Your Manners?

FUCKOFF: He’s Out Side Picking Shit Off The Floor.

Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina Dog Chow for Roscoe, our hunting dog, and was standing in line at Wal-Mart getting ready to check out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. First thing I thought was “where’s your sign lady” but decided to go with it…SO…On impulse, I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Weight Loss Diet again.

I said I probably shouldn’t, because I’d ended up in the hospital the last time. But that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is; you load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry, and that the food is nutritionally complete… so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story to say the least.

Totally horrified, the lady asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.

I told her no, I had stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter’s ass and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

She got upset. Made a complaint. WAL-MART asked me not to shop there anymore. It was worth it.